I've seemed to have lost the will to blog today. It's weird, the more evened out my moods and the better I feel, the less I want to blog. I guess it's just that I have little to say.
Today in group we did a "mindfulness exercise" in which she rang a bell, letting the sound dwindle away completely between rings, and we were supposed to concentrate on the sound to the exclusion of everything else except breathing. I found it difficult to concentrate like that, and my mind went all over the place, thinking about the letter from the lawyer yesterday initiating divorce proceedings, thinking about what I have to do today in terms of errands and tasks, about the new guy in group, etc. I'm getting better at simply letting those thoughts come and go, though. I'm not all up and anxious at the moment. It's kind of nice.
I didn't really talk today in group. I wonder if that counts as obstructing therapy? I dunno. I just had nothing to say. It's like blogging right now. Blank, for the most part. I thought about saying something about how important it is to want to be happy, the wanting being crucial to being that way. Sometimes I think it's easier to hold onto dark feelings than to replace them with the light.
Comments