Get Cher Bad Ideas HERE!

I was just thinking about all my medication, since I just took it all (five pills in the morning). You might think it would do something besides work on my moods, and I think the Ativan does sort of insulate me from the world, but the other ones are not painkillers at all. What the hell DO they do? I wish I knew how they worked, but if you look them up it's all "dopamine this and neurotransmitter that." Oh yeah, right, now I understand... But what I want to know is more vague. I guess I already know that Lamictal is an upper and Lithium's the downer. I don't know what I want to know. Something else. I want to get off some of the pills, frankly, even though I'm finally feeling stabilized. Maybe because I'm feeling stabilized I'm thinking yeah, it's time to cut through some of this crap I'm putting in my body.

Saturday, it's a good day to read about Bad Ideas. Pdoc wouldn't steer me wrong, right? Wrong! He's pretty pill happy, wouldn't you say? I'm always amazed on bipolar boards when people talk about being on one medication at a time.

I don't know what I'm talking about. Saturday, as I said. It's the day to babble incoherently into your post window. I think today I'll cut down on the Ativan a bit and see what happens.

Comments

[Heidi]

Because you're feeling stabilized you think you should make changes in your meds? What are you, nuts? (Irony intended.) Be happy to be stabilized, and go concentrate on something else.

[Jo]

I know, I know. That's why it's a bad idea. But I'm wondering about the dizziness, still. Oh fuck what am I saying. I'll let pdoc tell me what to do. And also maybe the heart monitor will tell me something.

[Keith]

I've never been on any pills, so I'm only guessing here, but I would bet that when somenone on a prescription(s) for the first time begins to level out, they would naturally be curious if they could "make it" without the pills.

I would also guess wildly that the percentage of people who give in to this curiosity is very high.

[Jo]

Heidi, again I'm sorry for your loss.

[Heidi]

Thanks, Jo. Time is indeed a great healer. As are snuggly cats.

[Rose]

Yeah, that happens all the time (the I'm all better thing). Unfortunately, for a lot of people it leads to hospitalization.

I think it is because we are used to taking pills, like antibiotics, that cure us. So we think these pills are curing us, or our new insights are curing us.

I'm quitting smoking right now and you know what--I know exactly why I smoke, and what triggers me, and etc, and I have found that knowing that stuff makes it moderately easier, but I still have to go through all the shitty going from smoker to ex-smoker stuff.

Chronic conditions of any kind are really big on non-compliance. Especially if the meds suck ass.

Anyway, I hope you'll talk to P-Doc before you make any choices...I think he is on your side.

[Jo]

Yeah, it's funny to be aware of it but at the same time completely convinced that it is time to cut back on some of this stuff.

[Rose]

Yeah, I can totally relate. Thats what I meant to say really.

Rose

['mouse]

Hey, I'm excited to see typepad remembered me today!

Other than that the one thing I've heard about a million times is "I'm feeling better now, I'm sure I don't need all these pills." It's been true once or twice, I'd imagine. Meanwhile, PLEASE let the doc make the decision whether or not you can be weaned off what and when. The one thing that can't be trusted with these decisions is the well-medicated brain.

[Alison]

If you are on lithium and feeling dizzy, get your blood level checked. Lithium toxicity is nothing to fool around with. While you're at it, ask your psychiatrist to order a blood test of your kidney function, which you should be getting every 3 to 4 months while you are on lithium, but many if not most psychiatrists don't do this.

You don't want to know how I know this.

[savtadotty]

You also don't want to know how I know that Alison is right.

[Jo]

Stupid LIthium. Spoiling all our fun.

[Mark]

I take Ativan only when I'm stressed out, for one or two days. Then the days after when I stop the Ativan the stress and worry seems very much worse( but its ok because nothing is going on). I wish I could take it every day, I love the way I feel on it, but then you get used to it, don't you? A tolerance ? So then you need more and/or you can't be "normal" without it. Be careful coming off it, as I myself feel extra nervous and worried coming off it, but my rational logical mind can overcome the emotional one.

[Gianna]

I was on 7 meds at one time. My doctor was pill happy as you say yours is. I'm down to three meds. Plan to come off of everything. I've been on drugs for 20 years and I have to say I've gotten worse. Not the mood disorder per se, but my coping skills in general. I've been tapering down for three years with no adverse effects except for expected withdrawal symptoms. No signs of relapse and even less evidence of bipolar mood swings. And I'm learning to cope naturally. I really believe the drugs were making me swing more. Getting off anti-depressants was the first really good thing I did.

I'm supporting my body with diet, nutritional supplements and neurofeedback. I'm in touch with large communities of people doing the same thing I'm doing slowly, safely and effectively. Psychiatrists, in general, are clueless about withdrawal, they're trained to put you on drugs, not take you off. If you want to know more send me a note. I have managed to find a doctor to support me, even if I do have to educate him in the process.

Gianna

[Jo]

I have a feeling it's different for different bodies. I've learned that bipolar ramps itself up each "episode" when you're sick, and you never go back to square one. I feel as though I'm getting over an episode, even though it has lasted a year.

I don't know how I feel about going off meds like that. I think they're helping me tremendously and they keep me even. I wonder how I'll feel in 20 years?

And as for Ativan, I have myself disciplined to 1.5 mg a day and I stick to it. I know i'm addicted, however. No question about that. I'd like to get off it if possible, but then I have panic attacks every half hour. Bad.

[Gianna]

The thing with benzo's is that they have to be titrated off very very slowly. Like 2% of current dose a week. You can't just go off of them...you get what is called rebound anxiety. It's NOT the anxiety you were prescribed the drug for. Once addicted and once a level of tolerance is reached, it's as though you are taking nothing. You are back to square one...dealing with your anxiety with your own natural coping skills. And then there is the fact that they cause damage to the central nervous system and it can be argued they actually make you more sensitive to stress and anxiety. That is how it was for me anyway. My anxiety never went away...I just kept taking more and more benzo's. (klonopin in my case) Now I cope at the dose of which I am addicted and I will begin to withdraw once I'm off the neuroleptic. Why keep a toxin in your body if it is doing nothing other than keeping you from withdrawal?

[Jo]

Good point. But I remember the time before I went on Ativan, it was really bad.